Ricky Martin has always been sexy in the way that super gay and polished Latin pop stars are, but that doesn't mean that everyone pictures swallowing his La Vida Load-ca. The 45-year-old takes to the stage to recreate Tom Cruise's underwear-clad Risky Business scene for this week's episode of Spike TV's Lip Sync Battle. This is 100% the ~look~ that I've been wanting from Martin, because it happens to feature one hell of a bulge that has just enough jiggle that I A) KNOW it's not a fucking cup this time bitches and B) don't think it's super padded. We got a hot Latin dick ya'll!
Interestingly, in the original Risky Business scene, Tom Cruise doesn't actually bulge out because his shirt covers his tighty whities for the most part. Martin is like "fuckkkkk that shit" and decides to put his spin on the iconic scene by wearing a shirt that cuts off right above that delish bulge. He is not dicking around!
Or is he. JK that doesn't make sense. I love how Chrissy Teigen always manages to act completely shocked every time a celebrity does anything on Lip Sync Battle. She always claps and bends over just enough so straights can think they glimpsed her areola, and so they can forget that they're watching Ricky Martin shake his cock in their faces. Spike TV is basically Logo and all men are gay. That's the moral of this story.