Sometimes I think about sex, and sometimes—rarely—I actually think about things that aren't sex. Things like Wes Anderson movies. I’m a fan! I love Moonrise Kingdom and The Royal Tenenbaums, especially. So I wasn't expecting my dick to wake up during trailers for The Grand Budapest Hotel, his newest movie. But it did!
My dick is unpredictably zany sometimes. Or is it? I mean, there are a lot of men in this movie and a lot of them are sporting very nice facial hair, and I’ve seen a lot of them naked in other movies. Especially Harvey Keitel. There is a man who is not afraid to show the world his ass.
So, because Dewitt told me that I could write anything today, here’s my top ten list of boner-worthy actors in Grand Budapest Hotel and how I imagine that sex with them would be.
10.
FLORIAN LUKAS
Florian Lukas is a rather baby-faced German actor with smooth skin and pretty eyes. I bet he’s a total bottom who likes having his perfectly neat hair grabbed by the fistful.
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