Photography by Marc Zaffuto
I just had a giggly telephone love fest with Sébastien Lambeaux, a 37-year-old athletic-sock fancier from Paris with a sexy, mellow voice that sounds part he-man, part ultra-sensitive boy. Sébastien and I talked socks, socks and more socks. So much does Sébastien adore socks that his home is literally overrun by them at this point. He currently possesses about 1,000 pairs of socks.
Bruce: Are you the one who sewed this outfit out of socks?
Sébastien: Yes. It’s a unique experience. I wanted to feel all those socks around me, so I sewed them on.
By hand?
No, by machine.
Do you go out to bars in your sock suit?
No, no, no. It really isn't my thing to go to places like that, and it would make me feel like I was disguised, wearing a costume or something. My trip goes beyond that, there’s a very cerebral side to it.
As a writer, I was quite attracted to that aspect of it. I guess it’s a bit conceptual.
If you like. I find myself with an enormous collection of soccer socks because I've been buying them everywhere on the Internet. I try to get socks that have already been used by somebody, that have ‘lived’.
Are they connected to soccer or to other sports for you?
Completely, completely. It’s the fantasy of virility in the soccer stadium. I find it so handsome and so sexy, a guy in athletic socks, especially if he has hairy legs.
Really? What excites me is your getting excited. I’m excited by your excitation.
Ha, ha, ha!
And what about the feet that are under those socks? You like ’em dirty, completely clean, or doesn't it matter?
It’s all about the feeling coming from the person who’s wearing them.
Yeah, but what if they’re really, really smelly? What if you do get a pair in the mail that’s not washed: do you wash them right away? Aren't you afraid of germs?
Usually they’re washed, which isn't to say that I’m not capable of nabbing a used pair from the soccer stadium and then just letting them dry in a corner.
Where do you find people on the Internet who are into selling their socks?
I go mostly to discount sites. I don’t look for them in the gay milieu.
Then you don’t cruise that way on the Internet? As in, ‘Hey, you’re hot, would you mind sending me a pair of your used socks by mail?’
I tried that once and it was dismal.
What size are you, by the way? ’Cause maybe some of BUTT’s readers would like to send you something. We can put your e-mail address with this interview so that you can discover people with similar interests.
Sure, I’m size 44.
The first response will probably be from me… Oh, by the way, you have a boyfriend, don’t you?
Yeah. Sometimes he participates in my little experiments and he brings me athletic socks fairly regularly because he knows that I like them. Which doesn't mean that we have to have them on when we fuck. We can do it with or without them.
Lovely! You should come to New York. What do you do for a living?
I've got a tech gig at City Hall in Paris. But my orientation about all this is moving in an artistic direction. I’m thinking about covering myself with clay, in addition to socks. I've been making molds of my shins, and when they dry, they’re often imprinted with the texture. Actually, the personnel at City Hall had the chance to show their art at the Hotel de Ville. I proposed showing my sock outfits, but they wouldn't go for it.
Do you think they thought it was something sexual?
Well, it wasn't like there were any pornographic images drawn on it.
What about that homo mayor of Paris. Didn't he go for it?
Deciding isn't really his job.
Oh, I almost forgot to ask: Would you rather have somebody wearing athletic socks who was very young, or would you prefer someone a bit more mature, or even somebody old? Or are you into all of it?
Not all of it, no. What I really like is hair.
Really! Well, I’m horribly hairy, even on my back.
Wow!
What about weight? Fat, emaciated, muscled — what’s your thing?
It’s nice when somebody’s well built, but hair is something that really appeals to me. I can find almost anybody attractive if they’re hairy.
When did you first discover you were into athletic socks?
When I was in school, the kids would play soccer. I couldn't really approach them because I wasn't into that kind of sport, but it really turned me on to see them in their outfits.
What material do you prefer for socks: natural fibers or plastic stuff?
I hate to admit that I prefer the stuff with nylon and plastics in it, because cotton socks just aren't elastic enough.
What about elegant socks? Silk. Something expensive made by, say, Hanro, for example?
Not really my thing. If it’s too transparent it starts to feel too feminine.
And what about undies?
I’m not that into them, but a nice package in skivvies is something I probably wouldn't turn down.
Seems like we have quite a bit in common.
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