Sailor Caught On Instagram Forced To Come Out To His Squadron

"[He] walked up to me and said, 'I’m glad I’m not deploying with you, I wouldn’t trust a fag with my life."

From: NewNowNext

We’re in a post-Don’t Ask Don’t Tell world, but that doesn’t mean its always easy to be gay in the military. Conner Curnick hadn’t been planning on coming out to his fellow sailors last year, but when they uncovered his candid Instagrams, the cat was out of the bag.

I couldn't imagine a better day to post this. The #visibleme campaign is bringing to light the struggles of the #lgbt community. So here is my story- from around 11-12 years old, I knew I was gay. At first, I was really depressed and hid my feelings deep is thin myself, afraid to come to terms with who I really was. There were days I wished that I was never born. The struggle destroyed me emotionally. For the next several years I would simply hide my feelings- becoming more comfortable with them myself, but never admitting them to anyone. It took my years to even be able to say "I am gay" when I was alone. It wasn't until I was 18-19 that I finally accepted myself, but I was afraid of what the people around me thought. When I was 20 I finally came out. I finally reached the point that I didn't care what anyone thought and I was going to live he life I wanted. My support had been overwhelming amazing from my family and friends. While I still face hate and discrimination on an almost daily basis- I no longer let it bother me. I use it as fuel to become the best and strongest person I can be. #Instagay #selfie #dc #pride #navy

A photo posted by Conner Curnick (@cdcurnick) on Jun 12, 2016 at 11:44am PDT

After he posted a photo with a guy he was seeing, his friends at the U.S. Naval Base in Pensacola confronted him.

‘Explain this,’ said one message on the post. “Curnick, are you gay?” asked another. “Don’t lie to us.”

In a first-person essay on Outsports, Curnic, a 22-year-old petty officer third class, admits “my biggest fear had come to fruition.”

Feeling scared and alone, he acknowledged the truth, telling them, “Yes, I’m gay.”

Thankfully, he says, the reactions “were overwhelmingly positive.”

#Murica @rowdygentleman @chubbies

A photo posted by Conner Curnick (@cdcurnick) on Jul 24, 2016 at 1:11pm PDT

“While I did lose a few friends, the ones closest to me became even closer—because I no longer had to lie about who I was… For the first time they knew what was really going on in my life.”

There have been some ugly moments.

“This past spring, in combat training before my deployment to Afghanistan, someone found out I was gay. [He] walked up to me and said, ’I’m glad I’m not deploying with you, I wouldn’t trust a fag with my life.’ This despite the fact I was one of the better marksmen and performers in my class.”

Found one of the few lone sailor statues scattered throughout America

A photo posted by Conner Curnick (@cdcurnick) on Sep 28, 2015 at 1:53pm PDT

Curnick says he uses those negative comments “to fuel my fire to succeed in everything that I do.”

While his close friends and family have been supportive, Curnick admits the biggest problem was learning to love accept his authentic self.

I built a wall and never let anyone through. It was really tough at first, leading me to very dark places mentally. Reading coming out stories like the one I am writing — and how people were greeted with love and open arms — was what kept me going.

Originally enrolling in the Naval Special Warfare Program, one of the branch’s toughest, Curnick says homophobic slurs were a part of everyday life. “I distinctly remember one day when an instructor said, ’Oh look at those faggots,’ and then turned to us saying, ’Wait, it’s OK to be gay, YOU just can’t be gay.'”

He left the program and finally came out at age 21. “Since coming out, I have become a much happier, productive and successful person,” he says.

Had the opportunity to hang out and party in DC with @mikeysam52 he's an awesome guy, really humble, and an inspiration to everyone. Keep on keepin on Michael.

A photo posted by Conner Curnick (@cdcurnick) on Nov 8, 2015 at 6:39am PST

Deployed to the Middle East twice already, he’s received numerous commendations and was named Sailor of the Quarter at his command of 2,300 Sailors. He also continues to play water polo competitively and is working to start an group for LGBT sailors at Pensacola.

#tbt to the @atlasrace with @alexforss back in February. Socal @spartanrace beast coming up in two weeks for me!

A photo posted by Conner Curnick (@cdcurnick) on Aug 28, 2014 at 9:11pm PDT