Tuesday, October 6, 2015

The Big Gay Mystery Deepens On ABC’s “Quantico”

Can the hot analyst get to the bottom of Simon?
From: NewNowNext
 A group of horny students, each representing an archetype, congregate in a secluded place where outward and inward manipulation leads to death, betrayal, and mayhem!

Oh wait, that’s Cabin In The Woods. Here’s what happened previously on Quantico.

The second episode deepens the mystery of FBI trainee Simon, who says “I learned from an early age that things are not as they seem.” He gazes at a table full of eyeglasses, and picks the clunkiest plastic pair, which he breaks apart. We then see him wearing the fixed spectacles.


 So what was that all about? Did he break them apart to install something in them, perhaps … a camera? A-HA! Eh, that may be stretching it. Well, we don’t know yet, but what other reason could there be?



Unless it was to install some kind of x-ray vision, which would explain why he’s always grinning like an idiot.


  The next phase of training begins, and the recruits have to work with analyst trainees (including the return of Caleb, who had a friend who used her connections to get him into the analyst program), and we meet Elias Harper, who approaches Simon and hovers near him for a moment, but sensing Simon’s wariness, moves on.


 Elias asks Nimah if she and Simon are friends, and she tells him that he’s trying to stay on his good side ever since she told everyone he was a virgin.


 Okay, that was a dumb thing to say.

Elias formally introduces himself, and Simon is a complete and utter dick. Elias tells him:


 After getting the cold shoulder, Elias apologizes for coming on so strongly, and hopes Simon didn’t misinterpret what he was doing.


 Yeah, you should be so lucky.

Elias tells him that there have been plenty of gay analysts, but Simon is the first out FBI trainee, and it’s an honor just to meet him. How does Simon thank him for his kindness? By acting like Elias just tagged him with cooties.





 Things get more tense when Elias ties to offer assistance on a training case, and Simon makes it clear that he’s not about to listen to some cootie giver.


 Later, Elias catches up to him and asks if he did something to offend him. Simon didn’t choose him as analyst, and when Elias tried to help out, Simon shot him down. Or maybe he’s reading too much into it?

No, he’s not reading too much in to it. Simon tells him they just met, and he doesn’t even know his last name. When Elias tells him it’s Harper, Simon dismisses him, saying “Well, I don’t even know you, so …”

Simon persists, and starts asking questions about Gaza, and wants to know how Simon got in and out without a permit.


Uncomfortable, Simon walks away, but Elias follows, and admits that he was, in fact, hitting on him before, because …

 Oh wait, that was actually his response to Simon wondering how he came up with so much information, and Elias responded “I’m an attorney.”

Elias tells him that he was just coming on to him before, but know that Simon has this air of mystery, Elias is actually interested in finding out more. He asks “Are you going to tell me the story, or do I have to figure it out for myself?”

Luckily, Nimah (or her twin, I’m not sure which one has designs on Simon) interrupts, and she and Simon make their escape. Simon leaves his glasses behind, and Elias discovers that they’re fake!


Elias comes back later to do some snooping, and re-examines the glasses, as Simon observes from the other room.

Elias comes back later to do some snooping, and re-examines the glasses, as Simon observes from the other room.

So what have we learned? Not only is Simon a possible fauxmosexual, he’s a fauxfoureyes. What the hell is going on? And why is Elias so interested? And why does Caleb have a different name on his phone?

Theories?

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