Sunday, September 22, 2013

DON’T DO THIS:

A GUIDE ON HOW NOT TO BE AN ASSHOLE
From:  Manhunt Daily
 It may seem like you have the right to list every fine detail about your preferences in any given dating/sex profile online. But you don’t. Sorry.

You are dating and/or fucking, and the beauty of embarking on such an enterprise is the potpourri of tops and bottoms that you can engage with, both intellectually and sexually. Instead, online dating apps and websites are a breeding ground for casual racism and overt, sanctimonious internalized-cum-externalized homophobia.

My first tip: don’t be racist and a hater. It is not cute, even if you think you are. You can have preferences, but you don’t need to list them.

- Daddy Mayonnaise
Allow me to translate the text of several real profiles:


 “No black guys. Sorry just a preference.

Translation:I can’t say the N word here, but I do jokingly say it with my white friends.”
 “Looking for masc guys only

Translation: I saw a John Deere advertisement once, so I bought a hat with the logo for a turnt up style, and I basically started accusing anyone who didn't look like me of being a femme power bottom. I also say turnt unapologetically and unironically.”
 Not into rice, or Indian

Translation:I live under the assumption that all Asian people have small penises, and I have decided, based on my sound logic, that I couldn't possibly have anything in common with someone who isn't white. Like, we can’t even be friends, so please just don’t engage at all ever. Sorry bye.
Hot white dads only. Fur a +++++++++

Translation: I have such severe daddy issues that I will only ever be capable of inter-generational love that will inevitably cease to be reciprocated. I repeat my mistakes regularly.”

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